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What an Odd Stage of Life! #Menopause when You Still Have Middleschoolers at Home

So, I'm at this really odd age and place in life.  It's like I'm stuck between several different demographics, but don't really "fit" into any of them!


Here's the thing. . . . I am in full blown menopause. At 47.  About 5 years younger than the average age to reach menopause, which is 52.  And I got there naturally, so it's not like I was forced into early menopause because of anything else going on in my life. Most articles that I click on that say "early menopause" (which I always am hoping to glean information from), the women are in early menopause because of having to go through chemo.  God bless them.  I wouldn't want to be in their shoes, and prayers go out to anyone having to go through it.  They are definitely not coming from the same place as me and there's just no way for me to relate to what they've been through.

Also, I began having kids a little later in life.  Not really late like I had my first kid at 40, but I was in my thirties when both of my kids were born.  I was considered AMA (Advanced Maternal Age) with my second one.  But, I don't feel like I'm THAT much older than a lot of moms who have kids the same age as mine, except now for this whole menopause thing, which is making me feel older!  Just for reference, my kids are 11 & 13 right now.

I've been trying to find other midlifers recently to form bonds with, especially women who have already gone through menopause.  To do that I've been trying out different hashtags on Instagram and Twitter that have to do with midlife, which truthfully, I'm not really happy about having to use!  I mean come on! Midlife? How in the heck did that happen?

Thankfully, most of the women I've found have been making midlife look good.  Awesomely good!

I've found a few very fun women to follow!  But I'm wondering if most of my fashionable new #over40 and #over50 pals are in different stages of life than me!  It seems that a lot of them are already emptynesters.  It all just leaves me feeling like I'm in this blank space where there are very few of us who are going through the same things at the same time.

I am the first in my group of friends to hit the "pause" button.  Two of my three closest friends were right  along with me when we were going through Perimenopause, but both of them are still "Peri" now.  We all go at our own pace. . . . . . and hey! look at that! It's a race I finally won!  Haha!  😜 😜😜  I was gonna say "A race I finally won without peeing my pants". . . . but nope, been doing a lot of that lately with this cold, too.  Like, every time I cough or sneeze.  Geez!

It's a weird thing when you talk to people about being in Menopause.  The most common comment is "At least you don't have to worry about your period anymore."  That's true!  And that is great.  BUT, I would gladly exchange having my period again for NOT having the symptoms that I've been ladened with.

In the past 6 months, my vision has become bad. . . yes! I finally need the dreaded bifocals or readers.  That's a very odd thing.  One day you can read fine, the next day. . . . it's like, "What the heck has happened? Why is everything so freaking blurry?"    Also in the past 6 months, I've had 2 major yeast infections and kind of an ongoing, lingering, almost on the edge of yeast infection most of the time.  And then I've also had a urinary tract infection that was bad enough that I actually had to get antibiotics, which I hate doing.  AND don't even get me started on the eczema spots that make me want to crawl up a wall.  And hair that has become limp and lifeless.  And dull, lackluster, dry skin everywhere. Everywhere!  I'm telling you. . . . my vagina is like the Sahara.  Oh yeah . . . . and apparently sleep apnea.  That's a thing for me now, too.  And truth be told, all of those symptoms are why I started this blog.  Women need to know that these symptoms can happen.

Everyone is out there talking about hot flashes (flushes), weight gain, and memory loss, but they're not talking about all of the OTHER things!!!   It's very rare that the other symptoms of menopause get discussed!

Anyway, back to that being in a weird space where there seems to be no other people like me. . . .

and those hashtags. . . . .

When I was trying to find more hashtags for midlife women, I did finally find one post for hashtags to use. . . . .

Here are some of the ones that were suggested along with #midlife. . . .


#midlife #over40 #over50 #aarp #emptynester #emptynest #babyboomer #genx (thank you!)
#oldschool #aging #seniors #crisis #retire #freetime #grandkids #teenagers (again, thank you!)

But do you see it?  I mean #aarp???  I'm not quite there yet.  And I'm hoping that it's at least 12 - 15 years before I have #grandkids.  #crisis ???  #freetime ???  Nope, not yet.

I guess I'm just having a hard time finding my online "tribe."  I know it's silly.  But, what a weird time in my life!!!   Menopause when you still have middleschoolers at home.  Just weird.

Which stage of life are you in?  How do you feel about it?

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14 comments:

  1. Life can definitely be interesting at every stage.

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    1. Yes, it definitely can be! Thank you for stopping by Donna!

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  2. I'm hoping menopause hold out for me just s long as my period did ( which was almost 18), I know it's coming so for me to know that there are small or large groups out there for me turn too is going to greatly help me out.

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  3. I have a lot of friends experiencing menopause right now and oh man, it sounds like quite the roller coaster! I'm sure being the first of your friends with menopause is tough, but on the bright side...you'll be through with it before them too!!

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  4. Looks like a great read to send along to my mom! Thanks so much for sharing this.

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  5. Interesting read, will share this with my mum :) thanks for sharing your experience

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  6. It really sounds like menopause is putting you through a lot, I hope that you can come out the other side soon and your hormones decide to balance out for you.

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  7. I have used cranberry extract capsules for urinary tract infections and regular doses of milk kefir helps for any gut related issues. Turmeric supplements have helped much with eczema and other inflammatory issues over the past 5 yrs. Perhaps you can give it a try. My doctor says that I am currently experiencing symptoms of perimenopause (at age 45), although thus far it is limited to 30-60 second hot flushes. My mother had hot flushes but not much else, whereas my father's sisters had more severe symptoms.

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  8. We are all at different stages in life, am I right? Glad you found a community and support though this "awkward" time I'm hoping my mom has your same experience.

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  9. It's that you found a community for this time in your life. Good luck!

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  10. Im in my twenties but often feel stuck like I havent ticked all the boxes I should have by now..

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  11. Thank you for sharing. I can imagine how it is to be menopausal with young kids. I hope your hormones get better

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  12. I'm 46 and still not experiencing menopause. No complaints here!

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  13. I am 50 with a 7 year old, so can totally relate to not being an empty nester at this stage! I'm not in menopause yet so can't help there, but all of the articles about this being the time when you can reclaim your life and focus on yourself just don't apply to me yet.

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